UP YOURS – A ROCKIN’ COMEDY
Also Known As:
UP YOUR LADDER
1979 – R – 87 Min.
D: John Hayes / Eddie Ryder
S: Cindy Morgan / Michael Pataki / Dyanne Thorne / Patrick M. Wright
DVD provided by VCI Entertainment
Widescreen / Mono
Wow, this movie is one of the worst movies that I have seen in my life and I’ve seen quite a few bad movies in my day. Granted, VCI is not trying to sell this as anything other than a crappy sexploitation movie, but I would argue that a movie should feature some sex to be considered a sexploitation movie. Now there is plenty of sex being talked about in the film and we even get some brief nudity, but the “jokes” in this film couldn’t even make a 7th grader chuckle…okay, may a few might. Essentially UP YOURS is a sketch movie a la KENTUCKY FRIED MOVIE, but nowhere near as funny. The whole film is a series of acted out “jokes”, the kind you would find in those old “Truly Tasteless Jokes” books, but here only the lamest jokes are used. Some of the jokes fall completely flat; some have long drawn out premises that lead to a fizzle of a punchline, and some just seem to have had no punchline at all. Not even the appearance of likable 70’s genre movie actors like Dyanne Thorn and Mike Pataki could help this baby out—Pataki was really trying too…and it was painful to watch. While there is no real plot, the bit that ties all the “jokes” together is a narrator that just happens to be a talking apartment building…I shit you not. To the makers of UP YOURS, I say, right back at cha’. - Fred McKennon

It seems our government has been in cahoots with a German Nazi scientist who uses families in the suburbs and experiments on them. Specifically he tests the scientific methods behind necromancy by kidnapping people in their sleep. When Adrienne Barbeau’s daughter blows her own head off, Buffy The Vampire Slayer’s Nicholas Brendon shows up as her son to find out why she would commit suicide. They find her taped diaries about the Necromancer and soon neighbors and townfolk around them start acting very odd. People start killing each other or themselves and then it all goes to hell. It’s an interesting premise, but unfortunately the whole thing plays off very convoluted and ends up just a mess. Barbeau and Brendon give it their all and they both do well, but the script and other characters just don’t gel to any satisfying conclusion. The twists are corny and the gore is old school bad looking CGI. Without a script, I can’t really recommend UNHOLY at all. NEXT!– Mark Engle

UNRIVALED
2010 – R – 109 Min.
D: Warren P. Sonoda
S: Hector Echavarria – Steven Yaffee – Nicolas Campbell – Jordan Madley
Blu-Ray courtesy of Lionsgate Home Entertainment
1080P Widescreen / DTS HD Master Audio 5.1
Extras: Trailers – Commentary – Interviews – On The Set – Fight Choreography – Behind The Scenes – Tapout Promos

Tapout knocks out a Rocky wannabe underdog story that preaches respect for the cage, respect for the canvas, and respect for the fight. Ringo Duran is a man on the verge of nothing. He takes one to five hundred dollar payout fights and when he isn’t getting his ass handed to him he works behind the counter at a local strip-joint. Most of the drive behind all this comes from owing a vicious loan shark twenty grand because of some heavy gambling in the past. Duran’s biggest fan and protégé brings a second chance at happiness by entering him in a national contest that could land a much needed 100,000 dollars and a fighting contract. If he’s going to meet this challenge, Ringo needs his confidence back. To that end he has not only his sidekick, but also his new girlfriend (who runs the strip-joint) and the wisdom of a grizzled old trainer/corner-man that once helped guide Momma Duran’s career to the top back in the 70’s. Of course, there are those who would rather see our would-be hero fail and it’s clear they’ll stop at nothing to make sure he does. Rocky, this ain’t. It thinks it is, but really… It isn’t. This modestly budgeted movie tries to convey a style that plays like a cross between the Bourne Trilogy and any generic hip-hop video except with lots of graphic nudity that seems forced and out of place; probably in an attempt to distract viewers from some sketchy acting. The soundtrack is made up of tracks that wouldn’t be out of place playing at any off-beat music store within walking distance of your local college campus. The Blu-Ray itself is difficult to judge since the project is filled with blown-up colors, soft focus, slow motion, etc. When rare clear and natural moments come it’s definitely acceptable, but Unrivaled will never be anyone’s demonstration disc. Not by a long shot. The sound is passable, liveliest during the fight scenes, but nothing special. That’s the reality for everything about Unrivaled; it’s average, at best. Though a greater attraction will certainly be there for big MMA fans, everybody else will probably want to take a miss on this overlong and redundant title. You’ve seen it all before… And better. - Michael Mackie